Visa Brainteasers
"This could be your lucky day in hell. Never know who it might be at your doorbell."
Today, I thought I might provide you with some sample questions from form I-485, which is one of several I have to fill out as a part of the Adjustment Of Status process. These particular questions are from Part 3, and may only be answered by checking a box marked 'yes' or 'no'.
Have you ever, in or outside the United States, knowingly committed any crime of moral turpitude or a drug-related offense for which you have not been arrested?
Whoa. Hold up there just one second, Mr. Question. You appear to be asking me to admit to crimes I've successfully pulled off without arrest. Uh...just to clarify, those would be crimes the authorities don't know about...
Hahahahaha...you must be out of your fucking mind.
Do you intent to engage in the United States in espionage?
Yes. I am a spy. Oh, shit. That was a trick question, wasn't it? You devious bastards.
Have you ever engaged in genocide, or otherwise ordered, incited, assisted or otherwise participated in the killing of any person because of race, religion, nationality, ethnic origin or political opinion?
Several years ago, I beat a Welshman to death with a sturdy oak beam because I couldn't understand what he was saying.
Do you plan to practice polygamy in the United States?
I need permission?
I hate these fucking forms.
Today, I thought I might provide you with some sample questions from form I-485, which is one of several I have to fill out as a part of the Adjustment Of Status process. These particular questions are from Part 3, and may only be answered by checking a box marked 'yes' or 'no'.
Have you ever, in or outside the United States, knowingly committed any crime of moral turpitude or a drug-related offense for which you have not been arrested?
Whoa. Hold up there just one second, Mr. Question. You appear to be asking me to admit to crimes I've successfully pulled off without arrest. Uh...just to clarify, those would be crimes the authorities don't know about...
Hahahahaha...you must be out of your fucking mind.
Do you intent to engage in the United States in espionage?
Yes. I am a spy. Oh, shit. That was a trick question, wasn't it? You devious bastards.
Have you ever engaged in genocide, or otherwise ordered, incited, assisted or otherwise participated in the killing of any person because of race, religion, nationality, ethnic origin or political opinion?
Several years ago, I beat a Welshman to death with a sturdy oak beam because I couldn't understand what he was saying.
Do you plan to practice polygamy in the United States?
I need permission?
I hate these fucking forms.
posted by Michael at 1:00 PM
4 Comments:
That's fucking hilarious! They are the worst questions ever.
Do you plan to practice polygamy in the United States?
Is there some kind of rider where you are allowed to practice until perfect?
As a matter of fact, acts coming under the generalisation 'moral turpitude' can be anything depraved, degenerate, or even EVIL. So I suppose it's a matter of opinion as to whether I'm innocent or not.
And Jams, you would lose that wager, you truly would, if only for the time I pissed off a flyover onto a passing car.
I've been in the presence of Mike while he's been incredibly drink, and he's as lucid and understandable as he is as when he's sober.
So yes, spawn of satan's loins he is...
Post a Comment
<< Home