The 'Before' Guy In A Ventolin Ad
"I don't know what it is they're trying to do to me, make me into some sick joke. But no one's laughing, and least of all not me. It's hard to laugh as you choke."
What the hell do you post about when Home Entertainment takes over your life and you don't particularly want to write about your job? It's not that bad, as jobs go, but it's not like I'm saving lives or meeting interesting new people or embezzling thousands of pounds or anything fun like that. I'm just training to be a manager. Silly, when you think about it. I mean, I've BEEN a manager, and it's a position that doesn't change much from company to company. You have a key, you don't have to make the coffee, and the customer is no longer necessarily always right. Whoop-dee-doo.
I don't know, maybe I'll write a post about the jobs I've had and the various highlights I've experienced. I haven't really gone there yet, and it could be fun. For me, I mean. It's not like I write this thing for you people. It'd just be another opportunity for me to look back at my life and go, "Oh hey, remember when I said that? Goddamn, I'm funny."
In other news, I have a really nasty cough of the variety where every time I breathe out it sounds as though there are fragments of lung bouncing merrily around in my ribcage. In addition to this, my new tattoo is now in the crinkly, peeling stage. It looks quite fantastically disgusting, and my work uniform has short sleeves. Yes, I now serve the public with a voice like the 'Before' guy in a Ventolin advert and dried up pieces of my skin drifting to the carpet like dirty snowflakes. It's a beautiful thing.
Oh, and I got the new Eels and Alkaline Trio albums by nefarious means. I shall post reviews in the near future. The Alkaline Trio album is...meh, maybe it's a grower. The Eels album, on the other hand, is fucking amazing.
And that's it. There is a big fat bastard of a piece of news lurking behind these rather mundane posts, but I'm afraid you're gonna have to wait awhile before I tell you about it. Muhahaha.
What the hell do you post about when Home Entertainment takes over your life and you don't particularly want to write about your job? It's not that bad, as jobs go, but it's not like I'm saving lives or meeting interesting new people or embezzling thousands of pounds or anything fun like that. I'm just training to be a manager. Silly, when you think about it. I mean, I've BEEN a manager, and it's a position that doesn't change much from company to company. You have a key, you don't have to make the coffee, and the customer is no longer necessarily always right. Whoop-dee-doo.
I don't know, maybe I'll write a post about the jobs I've had and the various highlights I've experienced. I haven't really gone there yet, and it could be fun. For me, I mean. It's not like I write this thing for you people. It'd just be another opportunity for me to look back at my life and go, "Oh hey, remember when I said that? Goddamn, I'm funny."
In other news, I have a really nasty cough of the variety where every time I breathe out it sounds as though there are fragments of lung bouncing merrily around in my ribcage. In addition to this, my new tattoo is now in the crinkly, peeling stage. It looks quite fantastically disgusting, and my work uniform has short sleeves. Yes, I now serve the public with a voice like the 'Before' guy in a Ventolin advert and dried up pieces of my skin drifting to the carpet like dirty snowflakes. It's a beautiful thing.
Oh, and I got the new Eels and Alkaline Trio albums by nefarious means. I shall post reviews in the near future. The Alkaline Trio album is...meh, maybe it's a grower. The Eels album, on the other hand, is fucking amazing.
And that's it. There is a big fat bastard of a piece of news lurking behind these rather mundane posts, but I'm afraid you're gonna have to wait awhile before I tell you about it. Muhahaha.
posted by Michael at 9:15 PM
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