Zero Tolerance
"I burn from inside all the walls. A dead man can't hear all the calls, who lives like a sheep in the city concrete, never runs deep, and dies from the heat."
I came alarmingly close to writing a serious screed about crime today. My random surfings deposited me on the BBC News page, where I discovered that Michael Howard had taken Middlesbrough by storm with a rambling and largely incoherent speech that seemed to say very little except that we need more prisons to house the millions of offenders we'll be putting behind bars with the zero tolerance policy we can expect under a Conservative government. It was all a little frightening.
"Criminologists and commentators frequently try to down play the problem by saying that the fear of crime is actually greater than crime itself. They appear blind to the fact that disorder and violence have became a fact of daily life in many communities across Britain."
Right. Because they never were before. In fact, before 1997, there was no crime at all. This represents a fairly stunning degree of hypocrisy from Mr. Howard, who attacks 'criminologists and commentators' before going on to make a scaremongering statement about disorder and violence in the very next sentence.
"Government ministers cite the British Crime Survey as evidence that there has been a steady decline in crime over the last nine years. But the BCS excludes lots of crimes from its calculations - such as murder, crimes against children under 16, sexual offences, dealing and taking drugs and shoplifting. It is estimated that around 12 million crimes a year don't even make it onto the BCS radar. The most reliable crime statistics - those crimes actually recorded by the police - show that crime in England and Wales has risen by almost 850,000 in the last five years. While burglary and car crime have fallen: gun crime has doubled; robbery has gone up by more than half; and, most damning of all, violent crime has increased by 83 per cent."
The really frightening thing about this is how many people will take it as gospel. If I were from a rival party, I could quote these exact same statistics to say, just for example, that police were cracking down on crime and that their efficiency in recording and following-up incidences of unlawful behaviour has more than doubled, especially in important cases such as those involving violence, firearms, and robbery. I'm not saying either use of the figures is correct, I'm just pointing out that 96.3% of all statistics are necessarily biased and prove nothing.
"'I've got my rights' is the verbal equivalent of two-fingers to authority."
There's a message for a confused electorate. Michael Howard wants to take away your rights, vote Conservative.
And so it went on. We're victimising victims, tying the police up in paperwork, not allowing teachers and parents to beat the living tar out of their degenerate children, and not giving police the excuses they need to run rampant on the streets, dishing out justice to anyone that wants some.
"ZERO TOLERANCE!" Howard screamed, citing the success of Ray Mallon, who was appointed Head Of Crime Strategy for Middlesbrough in 1996. Crime has been falling in the region ever since, unlike the rest of England, which has fallen into inequity, shame, and random violence.
Howard ended his speech by exorting listeners to move to the North East before accepting a substantial contribution from the Middlesbrough Tourist Board. He then joined spectators in a Mexican wave as a small group of protesters were dragged down a nearby alley and given a good kicking by the local constabulary.
The Liberal Democrats responded to Howard's speech by immediately outlining their own policies as regards crime. They were boring and meant nothing, but home affairs spokesman Mark Oaten was clearly feeling a little kinky this afternoon.
"Michael Howard's Alf Garnett approach to criminal justice policy is more hot air than heavyweight thinking," he said.
For those of you who aren't too familiar with the legacy of shame that is British culture, Mr. Oaten was referring to a fictional character known for holding outdated, right-wing views rife with bigotry and small-mindedness. Jesus...have enough time before to bend over before you took that one, Mr. Leader-Of-The-Opposition?
Tony Blair said nothing, but my correspondent revealed that the Prime Minister was heard to mutter, "I'm the shiznit, yo. Y'all are just playin'."
I came alarmingly close to writing a serious screed about crime today. My random surfings deposited me on the BBC News page, where I discovered that Michael Howard had taken Middlesbrough by storm with a rambling and largely incoherent speech that seemed to say very little except that we need more prisons to house the millions of offenders we'll be putting behind bars with the zero tolerance policy we can expect under a Conservative government. It was all a little frightening.
"Criminologists and commentators frequently try to down play the problem by saying that the fear of crime is actually greater than crime itself. They appear blind to the fact that disorder and violence have became a fact of daily life in many communities across Britain."
Right. Because they never were before. In fact, before 1997, there was no crime at all. This represents a fairly stunning degree of hypocrisy from Mr. Howard, who attacks 'criminologists and commentators' before going on to make a scaremongering statement about disorder and violence in the very next sentence.
"Government ministers cite the British Crime Survey as evidence that there has been a steady decline in crime over the last nine years. But the BCS excludes lots of crimes from its calculations - such as murder, crimes against children under 16, sexual offences, dealing and taking drugs and shoplifting. It is estimated that around 12 million crimes a year don't even make it onto the BCS radar. The most reliable crime statistics - those crimes actually recorded by the police - show that crime in England and Wales has risen by almost 850,000 in the last five years. While burglary and car crime have fallen: gun crime has doubled; robbery has gone up by more than half; and, most damning of all, violent crime has increased by 83 per cent."
The really frightening thing about this is how many people will take it as gospel. If I were from a rival party, I could quote these exact same statistics to say, just for example, that police were cracking down on crime and that their efficiency in recording and following-up incidences of unlawful behaviour has more than doubled, especially in important cases such as those involving violence, firearms, and robbery. I'm not saying either use of the figures is correct, I'm just pointing out that 96.3% of all statistics are necessarily biased and prove nothing.
"'I've got my rights' is the verbal equivalent of two-fingers to authority."
There's a message for a confused electorate. Michael Howard wants to take away your rights, vote Conservative.
And so it went on. We're victimising victims, tying the police up in paperwork, not allowing teachers and parents to beat the living tar out of their degenerate children, and not giving police the excuses they need to run rampant on the streets, dishing out justice to anyone that wants some.
"ZERO TOLERANCE!" Howard screamed, citing the success of Ray Mallon, who was appointed Head Of Crime Strategy for Middlesbrough in 1996. Crime has been falling in the region ever since, unlike the rest of England, which has fallen into inequity, shame, and random violence.
Howard ended his speech by exorting listeners to move to the North East before accepting a substantial contribution from the Middlesbrough Tourist Board. He then joined spectators in a Mexican wave as a small group of protesters were dragged down a nearby alley and given a good kicking by the local constabulary.
The Liberal Democrats responded to Howard's speech by immediately outlining their own policies as regards crime. They were boring and meant nothing, but home affairs spokesman Mark Oaten was clearly feeling a little kinky this afternoon.
"Michael Howard's Alf Garnett approach to criminal justice policy is more hot air than heavyweight thinking," he said.
For those of you who aren't too familiar with the legacy of shame that is British culture, Mr. Oaten was referring to a fictional character known for holding outdated, right-wing views rife with bigotry and small-mindedness. Jesus...have enough time before to bend over before you took that one, Mr. Leader-Of-The-Opposition?
Tony Blair said nothing, but my correspondent revealed that the Prime Minister was heard to mutter, "I'm the shiznit, yo. Y'all are just playin'."
posted by Michael at 2:36 PM
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